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Xena Warrior Business

A mighty podcast forged in the heat of conversation. Xena Warrior Princess fans Chris Sims and Allison Stock and the occasional guest convene every other week to watch every episode of the iconic nineties show and analyze what made it so endearing. The power, the passion, the danger... this podcast will change the world.
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Now displaying: 2022
Dec 19, 2022

This silly episode has everything. Manslaughter. Ethnic cleansing. The disappointing realization that your heroes are flawed people. It scared Chris so badly that he had to fake being sick for a month just to avoid having to watch it. Xena and Gabrielle find themselves on the receiving end of some desert hospitality, while Gabrielle contends with the fact that she’s a lot more warrior than bard these days. 

We talk about Xena Warrior Princess Season 6 Episode 5: Legacy

Follow us on twitter: @XenaWarriorBiz This podcast is the spinoff/sister podcast of SAILOR BUSINESS. Art by @barelysushi. Podcast edited by @allyspock. Support us on patreon at www.patreon.com/sailorbusiness

Nov 18, 2022

The Gurkh store called, and they're running out of you! This episode strives to answer the question of our lifetime: Who's Gurkhan? Gabrielle wants vengeance, Xena wants Gabrielle's head to stay attached to her shoulders, and everyone wants to be Number One Wife. Just remember, when everyone is Gurkhan... no one will be. There's only one joke in this episode, so please enjoy: GURKHAN OFF!

We discuss Xena Warrior Princess Season 6 Episode 4: Who's Gurkhan?

Follow us on twitter: @XenaWarriorBiz This podcast is the spinoff/sister podcast of SAILOR BUSINESS. Art

Nov 4, 2022

London bridge is falling down, my fair lady! After over 5 years of watching executive producer Sam Raimi's hit action/adventure show Xena Warrior Princess, Chris and Ally are diving deeper into the noted horror auteur's filmography. Much like Ash was dropped into the medieval age, we've skipped the Evil Dead movies and dropped straight into Army of Darkness. 

This is a commentary track, and can be listened to while you watch Army of Darkness! For those watching along, the film starts at 09:30.

Follow us on twitter: @XenaWarriorBiz This podcast is the spinoff/sister podcast of SAILOR BUSINESS. Art by @barelysushi. Podcast edited by @allyspock. Support us on patreon at www.patreon.com/sailorbusiness

Oct 21, 2022

Xena has bent Odysseus's bow. She set in motion the murder of Julius Caesar. She heralded the birth of Jesus Christ. The throne of hell is vacant, but won't be for long. Will Xena accept her fate as the new ruler of all evil? Or will she claim yet another historical event for herself and orchestrate Lucifer's fall from heaven?

Also: Will Gabby sleep with Joxer's hot son? And will Eve ever shut up? Find out in today's discussion of Xena Warrior Princess Season 6 Episode 3: Heart of Darkness

Follow us on twitter: @XenaWarriorBiz This podcast is the spinoff/sister podcast of SAILOR BUSINESS. Art

Oct 7, 2022

As Halloween approaches, there's only one thing to do: It's time for Xena to fight the devil! A hellmouth opened up in Xena's childhood home, turning it into a haunted house. But the spirits are not resting, and they're not in peace. There's ghosts, skeletons, demons, gross stuff.. It's as if Sam Raimi decided to make a television show.

Make sure to bring a blankie, because we talk about Xena Warrior Princess Season 6 Episode 2: The Haunting of Amphipolis

Follow us on twitter: @XenaWarriorBiz This podcast is the spinoff/sister podcast of SAILOR BUSINESS. Art

Sep 23, 2022

Welcome to the sixth and final season of Xena! We really are in the endgame now, and the fanfic writers have breached the fourth wall, the fanction is now coming from inside the writer's room! After giving up his powers to save Gabby and Eve, Ares has been demoted from god of war to just some guy of war. But does he still have a chance with Xena? We talk about grand entrances, fanfiction as a vehicle for career advancement, and the charisma and talent of the late, great Kevin Smith.

Make sure to bring a blankie, because we talk about Xena Warrior Princess Season 6 Episode 1: Coming Home

Follow us on twitter: @XenaWarriorBiz This podcast is the spinoff/sister podcast of SAILOR BUSINESS. Art by @barelysushi. Podcast edited by @allyspock. Support us on patreon at www.patreon.com/sailorbusiness

Jul 22, 2022

It's the end of Season 5, and the end of the pantheon of Greek gods! Chris and Ally continue their debate on implied vs. explicit Christianity, while Xena and Gabrielle continue to struggle with the redemption of Xena's daughter Eve. Goodbye, little ones. See you in season 6!

We talk about Xena Warrior Princess Season 5 Episode 22: Motherhood

Follow us on twitter: @XenaWarriorBiz This podcast is the spinoff/sister podcast of SAILOR BUSINESS. Art by @barelysushi. Podcast edited by @allyspock. Support us on patreon at www.patreon.com/sailorbusiness

Jul 8, 2022

Continuing where Livia left off, Eve continues to be super good at killing people, making everyone a bit unsure of how to deal with her. Chris discovers the benefits of transformative work, while Ally argues that a Jesus allegory works better than actual Jesus. Both discuss the complications of goodness and birthright, while Xena and Gabrielle say goodbye to one of their own.

We talk about Xena Warrior Princess Season 5 Episode 21: Eve

Follow us on twitter: @XenaWarriorBiz This podcast is the spinoff/sister podcast of SAILOR BUSINESS. Art by @barelysushi. Podcast edited by @allyspock. Support us on patreon at www.patreon.com/sailorbusiness

Jun 24, 2022

Xena punches her way out of her own coffin only to find out that she and Gabrielle have been dead for 25 years… and that her baby daughter Eve grew up to become the greatest warlord the world has ever seen. It is the distant future (the distant future) and Xena’s really stepped in it this time!

We talk about Xena Warrior Princess Season 5 Episode 20: Livia

Follow us on twitter: @XenaWarriorBiz This podcast is the spinoff/sister podcast of SAILOR BUSINESS. Art by @barelysushi. Podcast edited by @allyspock. Support us on patreon at www.patreon.com/sailorbusiness

Jun 10, 2022

What happens when the person you love has changed so much that they no longer embody the characteristics that made you fall in love in the first place? Anyway, Xena has to pull off a fuckery to get the gods off her back once and for all. Will she and Gabrielle pull it off? Or will the Twilight of the Gods just get even more convoluted?

We talk about Xena Warrior Princess Season 5 Episode 19: Looking Death in the Eye

Follow us on twitter: @XenaWarriorBiz This podcast is the spinoff/sister podcast of SAILOR BUSINESS. Art by @barelysushi. Podcast edited by @allyspock. Support us on patreon at www.patreon.com/sailorbusiness

May 27, 2022

What would you do if you could only have skin for 99 minutes? After over 5 years of watching executive producer Sam Raimi's hit action/adventure show Xena Warrior Princess, Chris and Ally decided to dive deeper into the noted horror auteur's filmography. First up on our list is Darkman, a 1990 superhero origin story starring Liam Neeson as Dr. Peyton Westlake, an awkward dude who loses his skin for a real estate deal.

This is a commentary track, and can be listened to while you watch Darkman! For those watching along, the film starts at 6:33.

Follow us on twitter: @XenaWarriorBiz This podcast is the spinoff/sister podcast of SAILOR BUSINESS. Art by @barelysushi. Podcast edited by @allyspock. Support us on patreon at www.patreon.com/sailorbusiness

May 13, 2022
Xena goes undercover as Cleopatra, whose navy is  about to be exploited for the Roman empire. This episode is a vestigial reinforcement of the heteronormative agenda, and we hated it. As Chris says: "There is no reason for this." Anyway, enjoy Natalie Merchant! 

We talk about Xena Warrior Princess Season 5 Episode 18: Antony and Cleopatra

Follow us on twitter: @XenaWarriorBiz This podcast is the spinoff/sister podcast of SAILOR BUSINESS. Art by @barelysushi. Podcast edited by @allyspock. Support us on patreon at www.patreon.com/sailorbusiness

Apr 29, 2022

Do you ever think about what you're going to do with the rest of your life? You know, when you're too old to do kicks and stuff. Or, alternately, have you ever jerked it in the woods to a lake full of bathing Amazons? If so, you may be entitled to a death penalty! Xena and Gabrielle struggle to find the balance between ancient Amazon tradition and traditions of their own, while Joxer struggles to find the balance between his libido and common decency.

We talk about Xena Warrior Princess Season 5 Episode 17: Kindred Spirits

Follow us on twitter: @XenaWarriorBiz This podcast is the spinoff/sister podcast of SAILOR BUSINESS. Art by @barelysushi. Podcast edited by @allyspock. Support us on patreon at www.patreon.com/sailorbusiness

Apr 15, 2022

This episode was cobbled together with found footage from a failed television pilot where Selma Blair does an Inuyasha and becomes queen of the Amazons, and it shows! Chris reveals the secrets behind his top notch New Zealand accent and spits some hard facts about Amazon episodes of Xena, while Ally tries not to think about pirates. Finally, we welcome back Karl Urban in his fourth and final role on Xena as a caveman who appreciates the female form. 

Follow us on twitter: @XenaWarriorBiz This podcast is the spinoff/sister podcast of SAILOR BUSINESS. Art by @barelysushi. Podcast edited by @allyspock. Support us on patreon at www.patreon.com/sailorbusiness

Apr 1, 2022

To celebrate this very special episode, Chris and Ally are joined by Mary and Sascha, the hosts of Radio Amphipolis, Germany’s number one Xena podcast! This week, we watch Married With Fishsticks, an episode so terrible it ended with two members of the creative team quitting the show entirely. Kinks are discovered, rude gestures are censored, and many a cringe is to be had as we endure this failed attempt at a retro backdoor pilot conveniently repurposed into what just might be THE worst episode of Xena Warrior Princess. We watch Season 5 Episode 15 of Xena Warrior Princess: Married With Fishsticks

Follow us on twitter: @XenaWarriorBiz This podcast is the spinoff/sister podcast of SAILOR BUSINESS. Art by @barelysushi. Podcast edited by @allyspock. Support us on patreon at www.patreon.com/sailorbusiness

Mar 18, 2022

In this episode, Xena tells it like it is: if you're trying to kill her baby, she's just not gonna be nice to you. Chris and Ally revel in this well-written episode and discuss the merits of throwing animal carcasses into cities, and celebrate the return of Xena's original costume!

We watch Season 5 Episode 14 of Xena Warrior Princess: Amphipolis Under Siege 

Follow us on twitter: @XenaWarriorBiz This podcast is the spinoff/sister podcast of SAILOR BUSINESS. Art by @barelysushi. Podcast edited by @allyspock. Support us on patreon at www.patreon.com/sailorbusiness

Feb 25, 2022

It's baby Eve's first big adventure, and she and mama Xena have to outrun the armies of three angry gods that want them dead. Meanwhile, Joxer is still (still!!!) trying to reconcile his feelings for Gabrielle. Will he finally accept his place in the friend zone?

We watch Season 5 Episode 13 of Xena Warrior Princess: Eternal Bonds

Follow us on twitter: @XenaWarriorBiz This podcast is the spinoff/sister podcast of SAILOR BUSINESS. Art by @barelysushi. Podcast edited by @allyspock. Support us on patreon at www.patreon.com/sailorbusiness

Feb 11, 2022

We know we swore off Sorbo (we Sworbo’d off Sorbo) but we just had to get this last one out of our system. Becaues the writers of Hercules the Legendary Journeys have lost control of their show, so they go on a writers retreat to come up with some new material. Will the real Hercules (in disguise as noted antisemite Kevin Sorbo) be able to save the show? Or will the network just funnel all of their resources into Xena Warrior Princess?

Follow us on twitter: @XenaWarriorBiz This podcast is the spinoff/sister podcast of SAILOR BUSINESS. Art by @barelysushi. Podcast edited by @allyspock. Support us on patreon at www.patreon.com/sailorbusiness

Jan 28, 2022

Folks, it's baby time! Xena's still got a bun in the oven, and that bun is doing dropkicks! As our warrior princess contends with the dangerous world she's about to bring a child into, the Twilight of the Gods  (aka closing time) looms ever closer. Also, Ally geeks out about film combat, and Chris compares Tartarus and the Elysian Fields to… Ikea?

Featuring music by the Auralnauts and Semisonic.

We watch Season 5 Episode 12 of Xena Warrior Princess: God Fearing Child

Follow us on twitter: @XenaWarriorBiz This podcast is the spinoff/sister podcast of SAILOR BUSINESS. Art by @barelysushi. Podcast edited by @allyspock. Support us on patreon at www.patreon.com/sailorbusiness

Jan 14, 2022

This episode is burdened by two framing devices, each made weaker by the inclusion of the other. Will Ally make Chris laugh? Will Chris lose the bet? Find out! 

We watch Season 5 Episode 11 of Xena Warrior Princess: Punchlines

Follow us on twitter: @XenaWarriorBiz This podcast is the spinoff/sister podcast of SAILOR BUSINESS. Art by @barelysushi. Podcast edited by @allyspock. Support us on patreon at www.patreon.com/sailorbusiness

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